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Green Easter Eggs and Ham

As one busy Bunny was planning his big Egg Hunt and gathering chocolate for a google of deliveries, a gaggle of chess players gathered for a competition at the Ides of March Tournament.

And while there were indeed many delicious and scrumptious delights on the ground floor thanks to a local farmer's market - mmmm...cinnamon buns... Mmmmm... - the real action was on the 2nd floor at the Cathedral Centre as the boards were loaded and primed for the Regina Chess version of March Madness.

The madness began with one player who forgot we don't change our clocks in Saskatchewan, showing up an hour late, and most unfortunately for a certain tournament director, mere moments after he had be officially withdrawn from the event and 'clicked' out of the tournament's computer program. The director, being sympathetic, kind, and painfully unaware of the limitations of the computer program, let the latecomer back in which caused the program to begin spitting out errors like sunflower seeds from the guy who used to sit behind me at Rider Games and continually irritate me with his shells and saliva hitting me every 30 seconds... Ah memories.

Finally, the program crashed altogether, like the Stock Market on Black Friday causing all the previously entered and complete game results to be deleted and the remainder of tournament to be done manually - inside of my mouldy Swiss cheese brain - which only delayed the start of all the remaining rounds, the calculation of the standings, the ratings, the prizes, the lunch break, and even my trip to the washroom. But, hey, I did avoid jumping out the window (it was locked).

Then to make things even MORE interesting, Maxwell Smart and Zach Morris decided to leave for lunch without reporting - to ANYONE - the result of the game they had just played, then, they were nowhere to be found when the next round was 'supposed' to start, so it didn't.

Well, thank Good (pipe) ness that someone thoughtfully gave the tournament director a lovely chocolate bunny wrapped in golden foil because it saved my sanity - and was very, very good - as good as one players Mukluk Mad Trapper Hat.

But there were some great moments of note - First time tournament player Isfar Chowdhury posted an impressive 3 pts and captured the Top Junior Prize.

Zach Attack Linott scored an eviable 4pts to take 2nd place - narrowly missing the perfect score when he gave away a piece in an act of kindness to the old guy John who had the luck of Irish working once again. Still, Zach's 2nd place prize haul pleased his agent very much as it had been rumoured that she was not happy with Zach's earinngs of late.

And, the event was blessed with a visitor from a far away land, a land of Torque and Way better roads than we have - we shall call it Torquay, yes, the wonderful world of Torquay. And our visitor Robert the Bruce Graham, did not come bearing gifts of gold, frankincense, myrrh, or chocolate, but rather he came to conquer and conquer he did, racking up an admirable 3pts and finishing in a 3rd place tie with Justin Time Kline. Not to shabby for the newcomer from the Way of the Torque.

Take it to the Max Liu captured the 2nd place Junior spot, while the Tumultuous Trio of Andrew 2 hour Li, Avram Golden Locks Tcheni, and Luke Skywalker Argue all used the Force to tie at 2.5 pts and divvy up the Top Under 1500 prizes.

Oh, ya, some guy named John Doe Rey Me, or something like that, somehow managed to finish first. Talk about blind luck.

Well, by the time I am done writing this it will be April and there will still be over 3 feet of snow on the lawn as I look out the window.

At least I have my chocolate bunny...unless my dog got it off the table...sigh.

Thanks to everyone who helped set up, clean up, and make the event a good time for all.

TD & Report

John McIntyre